Archive for the ‘Random Writings’ Category

अधुरो!

Posted: July 30, 2017 in Poems, Random Writings
म तिमीसँग बोल्दा
तिमी तिमीसँग कुरा गर्दै हुन्छौ|
मेरो मनको ज्वालामुखी बीच
म तिम्रो तिमीसँग जोडिन सक्दिन,
तिमीसँग म बोल्न सक्दिन|
 
तिमी मसँग बोल्दा,
म भावनाका ज्वारभाटाहरुले एक्लै सेकिंदै हुन्छु|
म तिमीलाई शीतलता दिन सक्दिन,
तिमी मेरा भावहरुको राप सहन सक्दैनौ,
तिमी म सामु खुल्न सक्दैनौ|
 
समिप हुँदाहुँदै पनि
हामी हाम्रा अन्तरद्वन्द्वका बीच
 एक अर्काको खोजिमा
निक्कै टाढा-टाढा हुत्तिन्छौँ!
निरास भई घर फर्कन खोज्दा
फर्कने बाटो भुल्दछौँ
अनि…..
….
..
..
…………….!
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-२०७४/०४/१४
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Fiction

Posted: June 11, 2017 in Photographs, Random Writings, Writings

 

I looked out the window. A thick, sullied cotton-candy- like cloud was dragging itself. So heavy! I could sense the sketch of your lips somewhere in those clouds.
I felt a tap on the window pane. One-two-three-4-5-6789…The droplets gazed for a moment and then slipped away. I could vibe the presence of your eyes somewhere in the drop.

Unhurriedly, I moved towards the balcony. So lonely! As soon as I opened the door, my soul filled with the petrichor. I closed my eyes and let my heart flutter in the memory lane. There you were, calm. Your gaze, tender. You, Juvenile- exactly how I saw you for the last time, 20 years ago..

IMG_20170611_194938_596

(As seen is Jhamsikhel)

Poem

Untitled15

Posted: April 1, 2017 in Poems, Random Writings

The intensity of life she emits from within
overshadows the sun.
Yet she believes she is cold,
she is dead inside
and thrives on feeling alive.

She scuttles around the mirage of a palmful lustrous liquid
and believes it to be her soul.
Assumes it can charge her draining spirit.
Says it can fill the bottle of her happiness
and make her whole again.

But the last time she looked herself in the mirror,
she ceased to notice her soul within-
soft and silky-
it was fueling the breathless bodies around her,
it was healing the broken spirit.
She looked past everything
and silently dropped tears where she was standing.

But, Why?
Perhaps,
she is a butterfly.

****************************

-Ashma

3rd December 2016

12:59 AM

 

Walking-talking Rant!

Posted: March 26, 2017 in Random Writings, Writings

I walked and walked to clear my head.

Headphones on, random songs, broken concentration to check if there’s any bike/car ready to hit me and the uncontrollable random thoughts, I walked and walked even though my sole started to say “stop”. I didn’t listen. I walked harder telling it to shut up. Somewhere during my journey, I noticed a brown colored dog had joined me. I don’t know the breed, too naïve for that. It was a normal looking street dog for me. Knowing the breed isn’t important here. Anyways, continuity: it was walking side by side, an inch away. I continued walking. Once, I was one step ahead of it and it rushed to join me again, matching the pace. We kept on walking together. Every time I went ahead, it would try and join me. Eventually, it got tired of the game and then it walked ahead of me, away from me. I watched it with longing. “My companion just walked away from me!” With that thought, I continued my journey, unable to remember where it went. I did not notice when it left.

Empty stomach, dry throat, I was craving for food and water. I had a bottle of water inside my bag but I did not think of taking it out to quench my thirst. I was sweating like never before. The dripping sweats were absorbed by my clothes. I wanted to stop half way for a ride. But I couldn’t gather myself to get into any vehicle. But, I still had half way to go!

I used last of my energy to walk along the ups and downs. Climbing up was tough. I couldn’t breathe because no air was enough. Climbing down was effortless as a cup up an awesome milk tea!

Struggling through the dust, crowd and growing restlessness, I finally reached my home. A sudden feeling of peace caressed me when I reached into my room. But it couldn’t last much.

I immediately took off the sweat drenched clothes trying to feel free. I craved for a hint of elatedness. I let myself rest as I could not gather strength to dress myself. I enjoyed the nakedness as the sweat began to dry and my skin started to feel the chill. I tried to fiddle with the momentary openness.

I kept on trying hard and in the process, I pushed myself too hard.

And my head, it is the foggiest it has ever been.

****************************

26th March 2017

Untitled13

Posted: February 11, 2016 in Poems, Random Writings

Empty page-

Ink in the bottle,

Quill on the table,

Faint light,

Dark night,

Closed eyes.

 

I am rocking the chair,

She is rocking my thoughts.

***********************

-Ashma

हिउँद

Posted: January 4, 2016 in Poems, Random Writings

प्रेमको न्यानो आलिङ्गनमा डुब्दै गर्दा

हठाथ् कसैले छुट्याइदिएजस्तो

पर-पर हुत्याइदिएजस्तो,

हृदय चिस्याउने, आत्मा दु:खाउने

एउटा अर्को हिउँद आयो|

***************************

-आश्मा

साँझ

Posted: January 2, 2016 in Poems, Random Writings, Uncategorized

बिहानै उदाएको कलिलो घाम

शीतका थोपाहरुसँग मिसिएर

यो प्रकृतिमा सुन्दर मोतीको उज्यालो छर्दै

चिसा शरीरलाई न्यानो अँगालोमा बेर्दै

छिप्पिंदै-छिप्पिंदै जब ढल्न थाल्यो,

तब फेरी साँझ आयो|

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-आश्मा

 

When I read the name similar to yours that belongs to somebody else, I stop for few seconds and drift my eyes away,

When I stumble across the moments we had unknowingly spent together, I force myself to push the memories away,

When you appear in my dreams unannounced, we sow a conflicted relationship, together,

And the troubles I go through after I open my eyes, you are not there and with no human can I share,

I have made myself believe that your existence for me is nothing but a reason for the rage,

Swear I would give anything to keep you around, only and only if I had courage,

But, pain is not something I would like to choose for myself at least for this time,

and knowing about the distance that we cannot overcome and the truth we don’t chime,

Yes I’m enchanted by your existence! But I have to wish you Farewell, My Dear!

 

And make sure our paths never cross again, as it doesn’t strengthen me anymore.

Effortless? Easy?

I’ve been crushing myself into possible finest dust with the ticking time

And all and all I can do is scribble the unreachable rhyme!

Loved ones are never far, they say. Though they are distant, we always feel their presence. World has turned into a global village no doubt. But you can’t hug a person you see in the live-chat, can you? You can’t wipe their tears out from the screen and you can’t pull their cheeks just to make them smile either.

Though you are near with techs, I will tell you I miss you, but the associated feelings with it, I’m gonna hide. I will dream about you often, I will keep on searching you on the roads you’ve always been driving, I will search you in the mischief we do, those you cannot participate for a while and I will miss you terribly. But, I won’t tell you everything because I know how hard your life is there. I know how much you must be missing everything back here. I won’t be burdening you with what I feel deep inside but I will let you know that you are being remembered time and often.

In a year or a two, you’re gonna make us more proud. You are going to build your path yourself. That time, I am going to be among the delighted face among the crowd and that time, we will live all the moments together. I will not tell, but, you will know. You will know that though circumstances has changed, we can still be kids together, fight with each other and do craziest thing together.

When you will be back, I will be sleeping on your chest in the evenings like I always do and will be telling about how lucky I am to have you back. Remember the last time your were here and I fell asleep in your arms? Though you’re elder, you were sleeping like a baby and that was the best thing to remember.

I miss a friend and a mentor from my life. As you have to be busy and won’t be able to reply whenever I message you, I realize I miss you too much and I happen to remember the moment when I actually realized you were leaving for 3 long years and was trying hard to fight back my tears.

Please be Fine.
Lots and lots of Love!